Vendor Sales Tactics: The Good, The Bad, and the Bathroom

Source: AI-generated using ChatGPT

I’ve been in security for a long time. Over the years, I’ve held all kinds of roles: from leadership positions managing large teams with direct purchasing power to engineering roles with deep influence over what tools the organization buys to stay secure.

For this reason, I’ve been on the receiving end of a lot of vendor pitches. And let me say this up front: the vast majority of vendors are fantastic. I genuinely enjoy meeting with them, hearing what they’re building, and learning from their perspective. Many of them have become trusted strategic partners - some I’ve brought with me from company to company. A few have even become personal friends.

But… like in any field, there are occasional missteps. And sometimes those missteps are truly memorable.

With RSA Conference right around the corner, and since it happens right here in my backyard in San Francisco, I thought it’d be the perfect time to share a little perspective. So here it is:

My Top 3 Worst Vendor Sales Tactics of All Time

Ranked from “mildly annoying” to “seriously, please never do this again.” Yes, the last one actually happened. And no, I haven’t recovered.


1. Badge Scanning Snipers

Source: AI-generated using ChatGPT

Okay, this one kills me. I don’t know if this happens to everyone, but it’s happened to me enough that I’ve had to start taking proactive measures.

Picture the scene: you’re walking through the vendor expo at RSA, keeping your head down, doing your best not to make eye contact. A vendor rep steps into your path, smiles, and says “Hi!” I try to be polite, so I smile back. Then, without asking, they grab my badge off my chest and scan it.

No conversation, no context, no consent.

For those unfamiliar: conference badges often have embedded chips that contain personal contact info—name, email, phone number, company, title, etc. A quick scan, and boom - you’re in their lead database. You didn’t stop at their booth. You didn’t ask for follow-up. But congratulations, you’re now a “hot lead.”

Just like in Glengarry Glen Ross, once you're in the lead system, it's over. The emails and calls come fast and furious. You will know no peace.

My two best defenses:

  • Register with throwaway contact info. I still use my real name and company, but I use a burner email address and a Google Voice number.

  • Flip your badge around while walking the expo floor. If you have a prominent title or work for a big company, you’re basically bleeding in shark-infested waters. Don’t be chum.

Lead gen is part of the game. I get it. But consent matters. If you’re scanning without asking, it’s not clever - it’s creepy.


2. The Fake Referral Drop

Source: AI-generated using ChatGPT

This one happens so often it’s practically background noise—but it still annoys me just as much as the first time it happened.

Here’s how it goes: someone reaches out and says, “Hey, [Name] told me to contact you.”

Except… they didn’t. I double-check, and the person they named either never mentioned me, or they don’t even exist. It’s a made-up referral, used to lower my defenses and start a conversation under false pretenses.

It’s lazy, manipulative, and unfortunately still effective enough that people keep doing it.

Worse yet, there’s a close cousin to this move: The Fake Account Manager.

That’s when someone emails me saying, “Hi, I’m your account manager from [Vendor X]. When can we meet for 30 minutes?”

Naturally, I assume we’re already a customer. I even feel a little urgency—maybe I should know more about the product my company is using. But when I dig in, I find out: We’re not a customer. They’re not an account manager. It’s a bait-and-switch—pretending we already have a business relationship to trick me into a meeting.

This one isn’t just misleading. It’s dishonest. And it guarantees I won’t take you seriously again.


3. The Bathroom Pitch

Source: AI-generated using ChatGPT

Thankfully, this one only happened once—but that was enough.

It was RSA, maybe 2016 or 2017. I was between sessions and ducked into the restroom. I walked up to the urinal, doing what one does, and the guy next to me turns, makes eye contact (strike one), and says:

“Hey! I saw you in one of the sessions earlier and I tried to catch you after. Glad I ran into you in here!”

And then, while we’re both mid-stream, he launches into a pitch about his security product.

Let me paint the scene more clearly:

I am actively using a urinal.

He is actively using a urinal.

And he’s pitching me endpoint protection like we’re at a cocktail mixer.

I said maybe one word, washed my hands, and got out of there. It was in that moment I realized: There is no safe space at RSA.

Don’t ambush people in bathrooms. Also, don’t pitch while they’re eating or anywhere else people are just trying to be human for a moment. If your sales strategy involves cornering someone mid-pee, it’s not just bad sales - it’s bad humanity.


Wrapping It Up

Again, I want to emphasize: I love vendors. I love sales. Some of my strongest relationships in this industry have come from vendors.

This post isn’t about bashing the vendor community—it’s about calling out the 1% of behavior that makes it harder for the other 99% to do their job well. Sales is hard. Security buyers can be tough. But authenticity, respect, and honesty go a long way.

So if you’re at RSA this year: Let’s talk. Just… not in the bathroom, please.

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